Let’s see. Forty six days since the beginning of the year. Can you believe it? That translates to 45 diets this year already, and I haven’t lost a pound. I watched part of the Grammy’s the other night. Mick Jagger performed. He’s older than I am, but I weigh more. He’s so skinny his lips weigh more than he does.
Wasn’t it just yesterday… okay maybe twenty-odd years ago we played Pictionary as a family. Better than the game the kids suggested — “who can hit each other the softest.” The seven-year-old and thirteen-year-old had formed one team. The GAP picked the top card, and then read her word.
“It’s not fair,” she screeched. “He won’t know what that word means,” pointing to the word she had drawn. The word was OPPOSE. She was probably right.
“Pass to another word then,” I said, giving in to her whining.
“I’m not stupid,” the younger one insisted. “I would have known it.”
Cheezy felt compelled to show his intelligence. “Stupid” seemed to be the older ones’ frequent label for him. He often grappled reconciling this with his feelings of self-worth. As the youngest, expelling the “stupid” stigma remained a battle all his days at home.
“Okay, Smartie,” teased the older one, “what does OPPOSE mean?”
She shoved the card in his face and pointed to the word. “I know what that means,” he answered. “It’s where a guy opposes to a girl.”
No wonder he’s still single.
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Ummm…I’m pretty sure Mick’s cocaine intake has helped his metabolism significantly.