I’ve been doing this for nine months and I feel like I’ve given birth. I stare for hours at an empty screen while devouring every morsel of whatever I can find. (Believe me, that ain’t much with the Couponman home fulltime.) I feel numb. I looked up the symptoms. I think I might be suffering from postpartum blogging.
- Bloating. My posts are bloated with nonsense and all I can talk about is my newborn blog.
- Mood swings. And gas, I might add. I laugh and toot for no apparent reason. Many times simultaneously.
- Headaches, chest pains, heart palpitations, or hyperventilation. I feel all these things when you leave a comment. I love it. I think this must have been how my kids felt when they lived on the edge.
- Crying. Mostly on the 1st or 5th (first chance I get or over a fifth). Just kidding, I don’t drink. At least not yet.
- Insomnia. I’m up all hours thinking of silly things to make you smile. Tonight I went on a search and destroy mission for eye drops, only ended up cleaning out all the bathroom drawers. I’d blog about it, but how funny are clean and perfectly sorted drawers. Maybe a fantasy, but not funny.
- Trouble focusing, remembering, or making decisions. What was I saying?
- Being overly worried about the baby blog. Will anyone read it? Besides my friends.
I once had someone from France read the blog. I wonder if I’m funnier in French? - Not having any interest in the baby blog. I know that sounds like the opposite of the above, but I tend to sway back and forth. All my children are my favorites. Just not on the same day.
- Overeating and weight gain. Wow, I didn’t know it was the blog’s fault. That’s good. I was almost ready to blame Couponman. He says I blame him for everything anyway. Now I can prove he’s wrong (once again).
- Difficulty bonding with anything that doesn’t have a mouse attached.
It gets worse. Apparently there’s postpartum blogging psychosis.
- Hallucinations and delusions that I’m Erma Bombeck.
- Paranoia that someone’s going to steal my material, make a blockbuster, and I’ll be played by Joan Rivers (after her latest surgery).
- Confusion and disorientation leading to attempts to harm yourself or the baby blog. Please help. Send me ideas to blog about before I do something drastic.
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I’m going to have to think about this one and get back to you on those ideas! I LOVE your blog. Please continue to nurture it. It is part of how I start my days so you can’t quit!
Very cute! And, please don’t hurt the baby blog. ha ha ha Thank you for your diligent effort. You always make me smile.
I’ve been experiencing all those things and I don’t even have a blog. Maybe I should get one.
Maybe you just need to start a new blog with a new subject?
Bullet point #2 (fittingly) Too Much information.
Erma Bombeck . . ??? Um-m-m-m-mm Maybe Heloise.
Have you devoted a column to couponman’s driving? ( this could be good for 6 more weeks of blogging . . easy!)
Write a story. Publish one paragraph a day in your blog. You know you secretly want to be a writer. We all do . . even those of us that type with just 2 fingers.
That’s all I’m giving you. I have to worry about my own material.
We need copy writers badly. After looking over your website, We must have you on our team. We pay $35-$50 per hour. Our best people are pulling in over $90 THOUSAND per year, composing part-time.
Please stop by and see us. http://blogging.ncsall.org/