I love the smell of cut wood. I stopped by Home Depot after work. Couponman met me there. (He’s the one with access to the R2D2 or something like that for the 10% Veteran’s discount.) The only thing that could have improved the smell would be a patch of fresh cilantro right in the middle of the lumber aisle.
Couponman walked in to the huge warehouse. There wasn’t a loaf of bread or a gallon of milk anywhere in sight. He was lost. “Can I help you,” asked the young virile man carrying a hammer.
“Yeah, tell me where my wife is.”
“Was she wearing purple?”
“Yes,” my husband answered.
The young taunt man pointed down the lumber aisle to his left.
“Wow, the help here is great” Couponman confessed when he found me. “The guy knew right where you were. Even the color of your skirt.”
“That isn’t hard,” I said. “Purple’s an obvious guess for people over 50.”
Couponman, out of his element, carried his stack of 1×2 planks for the garden boxes to the front on a sturdy orange cart. I raised my stack (incidentally, one more strip of lumber than Couponman was carting) over my shoulder and strolled to the front of the store.
“Hand him your papers,” I said to Couponman.
He dutifully took out his military release form and presented it to the packed-abs (I couldn’t see them, but I imagined them) guy with the hammer, now at the cash register. “Civil War,” I said as he glanced at the discharge paper. He smiled.
“Very funny,” said Couponman. All that for $1.20 discount. Now that’s funny.
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Poor Coupon Man! He gets no respect!
Just two more visits like that to Home Depot and Couponman can buy a gallon of milk with his savings. LOL!!!
He’s got you there. He’s made friends with the manager of Sprouts and buys a gallon of organic milk for 99¢.
Please tell me CM is not one of those who will burn 2 gallons of gas to find a station where he can save 2 cents a gallon.
Civil war ~ that’s funny! Wonder what David would do if I used that line. He isn’t a couponman. If he was on his own he’d either starve or go broke in short order.