The other night I met Cheezy and Hot Wheelz for a movie night out. Brad Pitt was there, too. On the screen that is. My two escorts were chatting, so I took the opportunity to say to the cashier, “I’m really hot.” I smiled and gazed on either side of me. “I’m here with two good looking guys!” She smiled. Natalia did me proud. She’d definitely turned me into a rose between two thorns. My sons rolled their eyes simultaneously.
When I sat as a fan at Hot Wheelz’ baseball game, he hit a double
between two strikeouts
.
When my two sons, polished sushi eaters, took out the amateur (me) out to a Japanese restaurant, I was the fork between two chopsticks. I really tried to eat with the sticks, but they broke in two unevenly, and then I got this terrible cramp in my thumb. I never complained. My sons’ dipping bowls of full of soy sauce and wasabi were clear; my bowl contained particles. How do you ever balance rice on a stick? I snuck a finger or two into the equation to support the sushi rolls, but I guess I wasn’t too sneaky. Brown telltale sauce dripped from my elbow.
Afterwards I drove back to my sister’s where I have been staying. I’m directionally challenged, but I know men hate women to ask for directions, so my sister taught me the trick. You’re in a valley between two mountain ranges, big mountains on the east, little mountains on the west. This is the opposite of everything I’ve learned about the United States — little states in the east, big states in the west. “What about the ones up there?” I had pointed in the northern direction we were traveling.
“Those are hills,” she said.
“They look really big to me,” I laughed.
Now I’m about to head home alone, a heavily bundled Californian between two white and cold Utah mountain ranges (first snowfall of the season) where I am happy to return to being a grandma between two grandsons and a granddaughter.
Guess I’m destined to always be in the middle of something. Not a bad thing when you consider the alternative.
Related posts:
Print This Post

Did you forget your GPS — again??!!! Glad you are having some good times while you’re there.
Don’t feel bad. Like you the only thing I’ve ever not been in the middle is my birth. First, that is and you’re first in my book with a lot of things.